Do you crave the connection that physical touch brings? Do you feel loved when you are hugged or touched affectionately? Perhaps you feel disgruntled when you cannot be in the warmth of your partner? If this applies to you, then it’s very likely your love language is physical touch.
In case this is your first time hearing about the love languages, it simply refers to the way you prefer to give and receive love. Basically, there are five love languages. There are
- Words of affirmation
- Quality time
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
We all have a bit of all of them in us. However, one of these love languages can be considered dominant. In this article, we are going to be focusing on the physical touch love language.
What Does It Mean If Your Love Language Is Physical Touch?
If your love language is physical touch, it simply means that you feel loved when your loved ones touch you in a kind and affectionate way.
It also means that this is also your preferred way of showing others that you also love them. Just like every other love language, what classifies as physical touch will vary depending on the person.
For some, physical touch might be a simple casual touch on the back or on the hands. For others, physical touch might be cuddling or being more intimate. Others might yet still like every single type of touch but may place more importance on some.
I should also point out that physical touch does not always mean sex. Sex is only a small part of physical touch and might not be a part of your partner’s physical touch primary needs.
If your partner’s love language is physical touch, you should ask them what type of touch matters to them. You might be surprised by their answer.
How Do I Know If Physical Touch Is My Love Language?
The best way to know if physical touch is your love language is to take the official test. That way, you’ll know exactly what you are dealing with from the start.
If you have taken the test but still aren’t sure, here are some signs that physical touch is definitely your love language.
1. Touching Makes You Feel Connected To a Person
If your love language is physical touch, touching is going to be a connection to you. You are going to feel connected to anyone who touches you. For this reason, it’s a big deal when your partner surprisingly kisses you or touches your neck.
You simply crave such connections.
2. Physical Touch Is a Deliberate Act to You
As much as you crave physical touch, it irritates you when people you don’t necessarily love or know touch you.
For you, touch is deliberate and always means something. You simply do not want to share that connection with anyone. This is true even if it’s a casual touch.
3. Public Display of Affection (PDA) Is Definitely Your Thing
You simply love PDA. While this is true, the extent of public display of affection might be different for each person.
Generally, PDA makes you feel loved or appreciated. A rub on the back or simply holding hands can mean more to you than words of affirmation.
4. You Feel Alive and Happy After a Touch
After being touched by your partner in a really great way, you feel alive and happy. Absolutely no one can ruin your mood that day.
It also opens you up to having difficult discussions in a relaxed manner. Physical touch is simply your vibe.
5. Physical Touch Is A Great Way to End a Quarrel
If you and your partner are having issues, a bit of intimacy could solve the matter. As far as you are concerned, physical touch between both of you shows you still love and appreciate each other despite the issues you are facing.
However, physical touch should never be an excuse to stop communicating with each other.
6. You Can’t Keep Your Hands off Your Partner
You simply cannot keep your hands off your better half. Once both of you are in the same room, your hands can’t help but drift to their body.
Shoulders, torso, neck, and everywhere else will be touched with reckless abandon. If that’s you, then physical touch is definitely your love language.
Physical Touch Love Language Ideas You Should Totally Try
Wondering how to show love to your partner? If this is their love language, here are some ideas you should try.
If there’s something most people enjoy, that’s cuddling. It allows your partner to be touching you constantly. If your partner loves physical touch, this will totally bring a smile to their face.
Public display of affection will also work. So, when you are out in the public, don’t be afraid to hold their hands or simply wrap your hands around their shoulders. They will definitely be pleasantly surprised.
· Back Rubs and Massages
A back rub and massage will do wonders for your partner. If they are into touching, they will simply want more of the same.
So, if you are an expert in massages and back rubs, this is your lucky day.
· Hugging Is Priceless
Hugs are priceless. This is because there is so much you can do while hugging your partner. So, take advantage of your options here. You can also try to surprise them with hugs too.
They are simply going to love it.
· Spice Up Your Sexual Life
Touching definitely promotes intimacy in a relationship. So, find ways to spice up your sexual life. This will not only make your partner happy but will make your relationship way stronger.
Here are some other ways to show love to your partner using physical touch
- You can play with your partner’s hair. They will absolutely love that
- Initiate physical touch
- Dance together
- Take a bath together
- Whisper into their ears
- Increase foreplay during sexual activities
- Have regular fake wrestling
- Tickle your partner
Really, the key here is to make sure that your partner feels loved and happy.
What If You Suck At Physical Touch?
For some people, touching comes naturally. For others, it might be a struggle. This could be because of several reasons.
If your partner likes touching and you are having a problem adapting, here are some pointers you should totally try.
Talk about It with Your Partner
The first thing you should do is to talk about it with your partner. Tell them how you feel and why you feel that way. Then, tell them the steps you are going to take to improve.
Make them understand that it might take some time before you can be entirely comfortable with physical touch. Your partner will be happy with your honesty.
Take Steps to Improve
Next, you should take some steps to improve. You could read more about the things you can do. You could also take conscious notes on what you can do now and what you can add to that list.
Make sure you start small. Start with the little things that are easy to do. For example, casual touch is much easier to pull off than an intimate one.
Then, slowly work your way up to harder ones. You’ll be fine in the end.
Physical Touch in Long-Distance Relationships
Physical touch is pretty easy when you are together. However, if you are in a long-distance relationship and your love language is physical touch, then things can get really difficult.
Here are some ways you can cope during this period of your relationship
1. Video Calls
Video calls are the closest you can get to actually being with your partner. So, make the most out of it. Schedule regular video calls with them. Simply smiling or looking at them through the phone can do wonders.
Also, there are a lot of other interesting things that can be done over the phone or through video calls.
2. Visit Each Other
The truth is that there is only so much that you can do without seeing each other. So, try to schedule a visit at least twice a year.
This will give you the chance to have time with your partner. It will also allow rekindling your intimate moments together.
So, don’t be afraid to make plans to visit.
3. Talk about Previous Intimate Memories
Since you cannot create more intimate moments, you should talk about the ones you have already created. This will keep you happy and anticipating when next you are going to see your partner.
So, don’t be afraid to express yourself in the relationship.
What You Should Not Do To A Partner Whose Love Language Is Physical Touch
If your partner’s love language is physical touch, here are some things you should totally try to avoid.
· Rejecting their Touch
For someone who loves to touch, rejecting their touch is the equivalent of actually rejecting them. So, try to avoid this.
If you are simply not in the mood for some touching, accept it and tell them in a relaxed manner that you just can’t go any further.
The implications of rejecting your touch can put a strain on your relationship.
· Punish Them by Not Touching Them
Never punish your partner by not touching them. It will simply make things worse. Plus, they will feel unloved and abused.
It’s always better to settle issues in relationships in a positive manner. Using their love language against them will simply not bring any positive results.
· Starve Them of Physical Touch
Starving your partner of touch is also not a great move. The implications are enormous. Your partner might eventually end the relationship. If they don’t, they might seek that intimacy they crave from somewhere or someone else.
You might never be able to win them back if that happens.
· Physically Abusing Them
Physically abusing anyone is a terrible thing to do. However, it has a more traumatic impact on people whose love language is physical touch. It’s a touch of anger, hate, and resentment. Because they are constantly creating connections through touch, physically abusing them will relay this message to them.
Physical touch might be a struggle for you or something that comes naturally. Regardless, it’s an important part of any relationship. It’s even more important when your partner has it as their love language.