If you are an ESFJ, you have probably been told you are charming, social, and very likable. Well, that is really all that the ESFJ stands for. That’s just one of the many reasons we love this personality type. However, the ESFJ can be further divided into assertive ESFJs and turbulent ESFJs.
In this article, our focus will be strictly on the ESFJ-Ts and what you can expect from one.
Who is an ESFJ-T?
This is the turbulent consul. They are a variant of the core ESFJ. This type is a bit more reserved than a normal ESFJ. In fact, you might even mistype this type as an introverted extrovert if you are just meeting them for the first time.
What are ESFJ-Ts Like?
1. Less Social
ESFJs are by their very nature social animals. They love to laugh and have fun. While this is often true with ESFJ-Ts, they are often more laid back than core ESFJs.
ESFJ-Ts find joy in being alone and just relaxing. While this might not be up to the levels of the other introverted extroverts, you can still tell the difference.
2. More Cautious
ESFJs are often seen as popular people. While they are very much-liked and might show up to all the parties, ESFJ-Ts will show a bit more caution.
They will often be looking out to make sure that everything is safe and in order. To them, one of their deepest worries is being insecure in any way.
So, don’t expect to see ESFJ-Ts taking any risks.
3. ESFJ-Ts and Enneagrams
ESFJs, by default, are more likely to be type 2s than any other type. However, while some ESFJ-Ts will also belong to the large group, a significant number will also be typed as enneagram 6.
This is because the ESFJ-T is simply more cautious and conscious of being secure than the ESFJ-A.
By and large, a larger portion of ESFJ-Ts will still be typed as enneagram 2.
4. More Conflict-Averse
ESFJs do not like conflict. They prefer that everyone lives in harmony with each other. ESFJ-Ts believe so too. However, they take this to the next level. ESFJ-Ts want to live in peace with others.
They also don’t really like having issues with people they love. Thus, ESFJ-Ts can become people-pleasers. They might do this to ensure that everyone is always happy.
5. More Adaptable
For most ESFJs, what is accepted by society at large is what needs to be followed. They are very big on traditions and customs.
However, ESFJ-Ts are a bit more flexible than their core ESFJs. This might because they struggle to assert themselves in many situations.
They might also be looking to avoid conflicts. Thus, they might quickly adjust their views to fit the views of others.
6. More Likely to React Negatively to Criticism
ESFJs don’t like to be criticized. However, ESFJ-Ts are especially vulnerable to this. When they are criticized, it might take them a while to get it out of their system.
Being overly criticized might also make them feel depressed or hurt. If you feel that you aren’t having enough joy in your life recently, then you might want to check out online-therapy. They have licensed therapists who are willing to help you sort out issues you might be having.
ESFJ-T and Dating
Just like the ENFJs, the ESFJs are one of the few types that focus on the other person. Thus, they listen more and try to understand the struggles of others.
ESFJ-Ts are no exception. If you are in a relationship with an ESFJ-T, there are certain things you should know. Here are some of them.
· Who are ESFJ-Ts Compatible With?
ESFJ-Ts are most compatible with INFP-As or ISFP-As. It might be better for an ESFJ-T to be with an assertive introvert. They will also work well with ambiverts.
However, any two mature people can make a relationship work if they remain committed.
ESFJ-Ts can be very supportive partners. They are pretty much ready to do whatever their partners want if it makes them happy. Thus, they can be very good listeners. Because they actively listen to their partners, ESFJ-Ts are more likely to do things that their partner appreciates.
Just like all ESFJs, ESFJ-Ts are very reliable people. Thus, you can always count on them to pull their weight in a relationship.
They will rarely miss appointments and will strive to keep the promises that they make. There definitely won’t be problems in that department.
Struggles ESFJ-Ts Face in Relationships
· Less Adventurous
ESFJ-Ts are less likely to take risks. If they are married to a partner that likes a lot of adventures and makes spontaneous decisions, things might not go well.
They will be more interested in keeping the relationship stable. To ESFJ-Ts, being secure is more important.
· Closed Off
While the ESFJ-T will strive to be a perfect companion, this will often lead to other problems. Chief among these problems is the closed-off nature of the ESFJ.
They will struggle to be open and vulnerable in a relationship. This might push their partner away or create a strain in their relationship.
ESFJ-T and Career Options
The ESFJ-T likes to interact with people. Thus, they will do well in careers that require a bit of human interaction. They also find joy in helping others. Thus, careers geared towards helping others will give them fulfillment.
ESFJ-Ts work best in an environment that is harmonious and structured. They do not do well in an organization that is excessively competitive and has a tense atmosphere.
Best Careers for ESFJ-T
- Social Worker
- Human Resource Manager
Careers ESFJ-Ts Should Avoid
- Stock Broker
- Software Engineer
Growth Tips for ESFJ-Ts
1. Be More Open
Try to be more in touch with your emotions. If you are dating someone, your partner will want to know more about you.
When they ask, don’t hesitate to tell them everything if you trust them.
2. Don’t Be Afraid to Try New Things
While leaving your comfort zone might seem scary, it might be necessary sometimes. So, don’t be scared of change. Sometimes, it might be just what you need.
3. Learn to Say No
While you are more reserved and seek peace, there are certain times when you have to say no. Doing so will help you make your own decisions and have time for yourself.
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